Gītā, Rāmāyaṇa and Hindu Traditions on the Mind

Stories, signs to notice and what to do

Arjuna in the Exam Hall

Rohan Deshmukh, nineteen, from Pune, was preparing for a competitive engineering exam. His family had spent years and savings on coaching. A week before the exam, he sat frozen at his desk, hands shaking, mind blank. 'I cannot do this,' he whispered to his grandmother, 'whatever I do will disappoint everyone.'

Aaji did not give a lecture. She told him of Arjuna on the battlefield in the Bhagavad Gita, who put down his bow, trembling, with a dry mouth, unable to act, because the weight of duty and the fear of results crushed him. Krishna did not scold him. He listened, then spoke about doing one's work with full attention while loosening the grip on the outcome. 'Look at the work in front of you,' she said, 'not the whole mountain.'

Rohan found that this idea helped. He made a small plan of hours, not ranks, and practised slow breathing before each session. But his grandmother also saw that his sleep and appetite had gone, and that his panic was not only exam nerves. With his parents, she took him to the college counsellor, who taught him skills for anxiety, and to the family doctor for a check.

On exam day Rohan was still nervous, but he could work. 'Aaji's story reminded me I am more than my result,' he said, 'and the counsellor taught me how to breathe through it.'

How to recognise it

• Freezing, shaking, blank mind or avoidance before an important task, with fear of failing others.
• Sleeplessness, loss of appetite and constant worry in the weeks before a big event.
• Feeling that your whole worth depends on one result.
• Thoughts of running away, giving up or being a burden.
• Anxiety that is far stronger than the situation, lasting weeks and affecting daily life.

What this story explains

The chapter reads Arjuna's breakdown as a picture of acute distress and shows teachings such as focusing on action rather than results and equanimity (Gita 2.48). These support meaning and steadiness alongside, not instead of, counselling and medical care.

Probable root causes

• Heavy pressure from family expectations and competition.
• Perfectionism and a belief that self-worth equals results.
• Anxiety, which may run in the family, plus poor sleep.
• Lack of someone to talk to openly about fear of failure.

What to do

1. Break the big goal into small daily tasks and focus on today's task.
2. Practise slow breathing before study and at bedtime.
3. Talk to one trusted elder or friend about the fear instead of hiding it.
4. Keep sleep, meals and some exercise even in exam season.
5. Seek counselling if panic, sleeplessness or hopeless thoughts continue.

Whom to consult

• College or school counsellor for exam anxiety and study planning.
• Family doctor if sleep, appetite or panic are affecting health.
• Clinical psychologist or psychiatrist if anxiety is severe or lasts for weeks.
• Emergency services or nearest hospital if there are thoughts of ending life.

Do and don’t

How to behave and communicate

• Listen first, as Krishna did: 'Tell me what is weighing on you the most.'
• Say 'Your worth is not your rank. We love you.'
• Avoid 'Everyone is counting on you'.
• Offer a story or verse only after listening, and gently.
• Ask 'What is one small thing you can do today?'

Dasharatha's Grief, Rama's Steadiness

When Gopal Iyengar, seventy-three, of Thanjavur lost his wife of fifty years, he stopped speaking at meals. His son Venkat found him staring at her chair, refusing to move her saris. 'Without her, what is left?' he said. He barely slept.

One evening Venkat's wife Uma, who loved the Ramayana, read aloud a passage on the grief of King Dasharatha, who could not bear separation from Rama and was overwhelmed by his attachment. 'That is how grief can grip us,' she said softly. 'Love and loss are woven together. Even the king was not ashamed to weep.' Then she told him of Rama, who accepted exile with a steadier heart, honouring duty and still feeling pain, and who relied on companions Lakshmana and Sita for support. The story did not tell Gopal to stop grieving. It gave him company in it.

Uma and Venkat began to sit with him in the evenings, listening to his memories. They invited a temple group for the thirteenth-day rites and later for weekly bhajans. But after a few weeks, when Gopal still ate little, lost weight and said he wished to join his wife, Venkat took him to the family doctor, who arranged proper support for depression and grief.

Gopal still misses her. But he is eating, speaking and telling the grandchildren stories. 'Grief is the price of love,' he says now, 'but I did not have to carry it alone.'

How to recognise it

• Deep sadness, withdrawal, loss of appetite and poor sleep after bereavement.
• Keeping the dead person's belongings untouched, or constant yearning and searching.
• Sorrow that is expected in the first weeks, but does not ease or deepens after a few months.
• Statements such as wishing to die or join the deceased.
• Loss of weight, self-care and interest in family life.

What this story explains

The chapter's Ramayana sections on Dasharatha's attachment and Rama's response to loss show grief, attachment and steadiness in family life. Rituals and community support, together with medical care when grief becomes depression, help the mind to heal.

Probable root causes

• Death of a spouse, which removes daily companionship and role.
• Strong attachment and the natural process of mourning.
• Loneliness, ageing and health problems.
• Possible depression that can develop in prolonged or complicated grief.

What to do

1. Allow tears and stories of the person who died.
2. Keep gentle routines of meals, sleep, walks and company.
3. Use rituals, prayer, bhajans and festival gatherings to share grief with the community.
4. Sit with the person without hurrying them to move on.
5. See a doctor if grief seems stuck, health is failing or thoughts of death appear.

Whom to consult

• Family doctor if appetite, sleep or weight are affected or grief is not easing.
• Psychiatrist or clinical psychologist for depression or complicated grief.
• Grief counsellor or a trusted elder or priest for companionship and meaning.
• Emergency services or nearest hospital if the person speaks of ending their life.

Do and don’t

How to behave and communicate

• Speak softly: 'I miss her too. Tell me about her.'
• Ask: 'Have you had thoughts of not wanting to live?'
• Use scripture stories only as company: 'Even kings wept.'
• Allow silence.
• Avoid advice, offer presence.

Sita's Courage and the Gentle Choice

Anjali Sharma, thirty-one, from Varanasi, left a harmful marriage after years of cruelty. She was physically safe now, living with her parents, but her body did not feel it. She startled at footsteps, slept lightly, felt numb, and cried at small things. Her mother prayed daily and asked a yoga teacher to take Anjali to a class.

In the class, the teacher kept saying, 'Close your eyes and surrender,' and touched her shoulders to correct a posture. Anjali froze and left in tears. She felt she had failed at even this.

Her mother remembered the story of Sita, who endured trials, exile and doubt about her own honour, and finally stood in her own dignity. She said gently, 'Sita was not weak for what she suffered, and neither are you.' Anjali's counsellor, a trauma specialist, told her that ordinary class instructions can be hard for survivors, because closing the eyes, being touched and commands to relax may bring back fear. She suggested a trauma-informed way: small practices done by choice, with eyes open, a safe place in the room, no hands-on correction, and the freedom to stop.

Anjali tried gentle stretches at home, slow breathing, and listening to bhajans in the evening. She began therapy as well. She still has hard days. 'I had a say in every step,' she said, 'and that was the first time in years.'

How to recognise it

• Being jumpy, numb or tearful after a long period of abuse or fear, even in safe surroundings.
• Sleep problems, nightmares or flashbacks, and avoidance of reminders.
• Strong reactions to touch, to commands, or to closing the eyes.
• Feeling guilty, ashamed or doubting yourself.
• Difficulty trusting and feeling safe in the body.

What this story explains

The chapter's section on Sita's trials and trauma-informed yoga shows that survivors need safety, choice and gentleness. Traditional practices can support recovery, but trauma therapy and medical help come first.

Probable root causes

• Long-term emotional, physical or sexual abuse or fear.
• The body's alarm system staying on after danger has passed.
• Shame and blame placed on survivors by themselves or others.
• Lack of safe support and unprepared practices that bring back distress.

What to do

1. Ensure physical safety first; contact the local emergency number if you are in danger.
2. Seek a trauma-informed counsellor or psychologist.
3. Choose gentle practices by choice: eyes open, short sessions, no pressure, freedom to stop.
4. Make a calm, safe corner and routine at home.
5. Have a trusted person to turn to on hard days.

Whom to consult

• Clinical psychologist or counsellor trained in trauma for therapy.
• Psychiatrist if nightmares, panic, low mood or sleeplessness are severe.
• Family doctor for a general check and referral.
• Yoga teacher trained in trauma-informed teaching, only as an addition; emergency services if you are in danger.

Do and don’t

How to behave and communicate

• Say 'I believe you, and it was not your fault.'
• Offer choices: 'Would you like to try this, or just sit?'
• Use a calm, even voice; ask before any touch.
• Listen without asking for details.
• Say 'You can stop at any time.'

The Restless Mind of Mohan

Mohan Pillai, forty, a shopkeeper in Kozhikode, found his mind jumping like a monkey. He replayed an old quarrel with his brother, feared losing his business, and craved sweets and phone scrolling to escape. He felt wound up and short with everyone. 'Mind is my enemy,' he told his friend.

His friend, who attended classes on the Yoga Sutras, said that the old teachers listed five inner knots called kleshas: not seeing clearly (avidya), the sense of 'I' and 'mine' (asmita), clinging to what pleases (raga), pushing away what hurts (dvesha) and fear of loss and ending (abhinivesha). Mohan laughed because he saw himself in all five. The friend also reminded him of the Gita's line that the mind can be a friend or an enemy, and that the restless mind is tamed by steady practice.

Mohan started a small routine: five minutes of quiet chanting in the morning, slow breathing, a walk, and a simple habit of noting 'clinging' or 'pushing away' when he saw it. It helped him step back. But his sleep stayed poor and his worry about money grew. His wife persuaded him to see a doctor, who diagnosed anxiety and arranged counselling alongside his practice.

'The old words gave me a map,' Mohan said. 'The counsellor helped me walk it.'

How to recognise it

• A mind that jumps, replays the past or races ahead, with difficulty settling.
• Strong clinging to comforts, such as sweets or phone, and strong aversion to discomfort.
• Fear of loss, such as of money, status or life, that is out of proportion.
• Irritability and poor sleep for weeks.
• Looking for calm in distractions that leave one more restless.

What this story explains

The chapter's sections on the Yoga Sutras' five kleshas, Gita teachings on the restless mind, and mantra and chanting show how ancient models describe the mind's suffering and how practice supports calm. Modern counselling and medical care sit beside them.

Probable root causes

• Chronic worry about money, family or health.
• Habits of clinging to comfort and avoiding discomfort.
• Anxiety, poor sleep and constant phone use.
• Unresolved family conflict and no quiet time.

What to do

1. Set a short daily practice such as quiet chanting, prayer or breathing at the same time.
2. Observe thoughts and name them as clinging, pushing away or fear, without judging.
3. Reduce phone scrolling and late-night snacking.
4. Talk through family quarrels with someone neutral, or with the person directly when calm.
5. See a doctor or counsellor if worry and poor sleep continue for weeks.

Whom to consult

• Family doctor for sleep problems, anxiety symptoms or if physical health may be involved.
• Clinical psychologist or counsellor for anxiety and thought patterns.
• Psychiatrist if anxiety is severe or interferes with work and family.
• Trusted teacher or elder for guidance on practice, alongside medical care.

Do and don’t

How to behave and communicate

• Be a friend, not a judge: 'Your mind sounds tired. Let's sit together a while.'
• Share a verse or idea gently, after listening.
• Ask: 'What is the worry that returns most?'
• Avoid 'just don't think about it'.
• Encourage: 'You noticed it. That is progress.'

Parvathi, the Healer and the Doctor

Parvathi Hegde, thirty-six, lived in a village near Udupi. After her second child's birth she became withdrawn, stopped eating properly, spoke to no one and sometimes muttered to herself. The family believed it was a spiritual affliction. Her mother-in-law took her to a local healer, and they sang bhakti songs, took part in the temple rituals and visited a pilgrimage place.

Parvathi enjoyed the music, and the company of the other women gave her comfort. But after two months, she was still sleepless, had said that the children would be better off without her, and appeared frightened of unseen things. Her husband Suresh, afraid, talked to the village health worker.

The health worker brought them to the district doctor, who explained that this might be a serious mental health condition after childbirth, and that it was a medical illness that needed treatment, not anyone's fault. The doctor saw no conflict between the prayers and the treatment. In fact, the old Indian medical texts too describe mental illness and recommend tailored care: kind words, regular routines, calm surroundings, appropriate treatment and the support of family. The family agreed to follow the doctor's plan and to continue bhajans and temple visits as comfort.

With treatment, rest and family help, Parvathi gradually recovered. The healer agreed to refer others to the doctor as well. 'Our tradition cared for the heart,' Suresh said. 'The doctor cared for the illness. Both mattered.'

How to recognise it

• Withdrawal, poor eating and sleep, and very low mood after childbirth or another big life event.
• Muttering, fear of unseen things or unusual beliefs, which are signs of a serious condition needing urgent medical care.
• Statements that the family would be better without her, or thoughts of harming herself or her children.
• Family explanations of spiritual causes that delay medical help.
• Symptoms that persist or worsen despite rituals and comfort.

What this story explains

The chapter's sections on regional bhakti traditions, ancient medical texts such as the Caraka Samhita, and integrating scripture with modern care show how devotional music, rituals and community help, and how the old texts recommended tailored treatment. These work alongside, never instead of, medical care.

Probable root causes

• Hormonal, physical and sleep changes after childbirth, along with stress of new responsibility.
• Possible previous or family history of mental illness.
• Social pressure, lack of support or belief that illness is a spiritual failing.
• Delays in treatment because of stigma or reliance on traditional healers alone.

What to do

1. Take any severe change after childbirth seriously and seek medical help at once.
2. Keep the mother and baby safe, and never leave her alone if she speaks of harm.
3. Continue comforting practices such as bhajans, prayer and family company alongside treatment.
4. Work with the doctor and follow their plan; involve the village health worker.
5. Support the mother's rest, food and sleep, and share childcare.

Whom to consult

• Doctor or psychiatrist urgently for any severe mental change after childbirth.
• Village health worker or primary health centre as the first local contact.
• Gynaecologist or family doctor for physical check after childbirth.
• Emergency services or nearest hospital at once if she speaks of harming herself or the baby, or seems very confused.

Do and don’t

How to behave and communicate

• Speak gently: 'You are not alone, and this is an illness that can be treated.'
• Avoid blame: 'This is not your fault.'
• Listen to her fears without arguing about unusual beliefs.
• Tell her the plan in simple words.
• Ask 'What would make you feel safer today?'

This book is for education and general awareness. It does not replace diagnosis or treatment by a qualified professional. If anyone is in danger, contact your local emergency services.