Psychology for Everyone

Maya Will Not Sit Still, Or Is It More?

Maya, eight, in Hyderabad, had been called lazy and careless by her teacher. She lost her things, stared out of the window and sometimes cried before school. Her parents, Neha and Suresh, were told to wait and see. A yea…

Maya, eight, in Hyderabad, had been called lazy and careless by her teacher. She lost her things, stared out of the window and sometimes cried before school. Her parents, Neha and Suresh, were told to wait and see. A year later nothing had improved, and Maya had started saying she was stupid.

Neha finally took Maya to a paediatrician. The doctor spoke with Maya in a gentle way, observed her at play and asked about pregnancy, early development, sleep and family. She asked the school to send a report and gave both parents and the teacher a questionnaire.

Because children cannot always describe their feelings in words, the doctor explained, assessment includes interviews with the child and carers, school information, observation and sometimes tests of learning or attention. She also ruled out hearing, eyesight and sleep problems.

A clinical psychologist later assessed Maya's attention and learning and found she had a specific learning difficulty and attention problems, as well as some anxiety. Neha said, 'I wish we had not waited.' The doctor replied that earlier help brings better results, and today was a good day. School adjustments, a plan for the family and regular review began, and Maya's mood lifted when the adults changed how they spoke to her.

How to recognise it

  • A child labelled lazy, careless or naughty with no assessment.

  • Difficulties persisting across home and school for months.

  • Tears, low confidence or avoidance of school.

  • Parents advised to 'wait and see' while problems continue.

  • Possible hidden causes such as hearing, vision, sleep or learning problems.

What this story explains

This story shows how children are assessed, using the child, parents, school, observation, developmental history and tests, and why waiting too long costs the child.

Probable root causes

  • Specific learning or attention difficulties.

  • Anxiety or low confidence from repeated criticism.

  • Undetected hearing, vision or sleep problems.

  • Family or school stress.

  • Lack of early assessment and misunderstanding of the child's behaviour.

What to do

  1. Write down what you see at home and when it began.

  2. Ask the school for specific examples and a written report.

  3. Visit a paediatrician or child specialist, with the child comfortable and informed.

  4. Share the developmental history from pregnancy and early years.

  5. Check hearing, vision and sleep as part of the assessment.

  6. Work with the school on adjustments and review progress.

Whom to consult

  • Paediatrician or family doctor for a first assessment and physical checks.

  • Clinical psychologist or child psychiatrist for developmental and learning assessment.

  • School counsellor or special educator for classroom support.

  • Emergency service or hospital if the child talks of self-harm or is in danger.

Do and don’t

Do Don’t
Do act early. Don't call her lazy or stupid.
Do speak kindly to the child. Don't wait and see for too long.
Do share information between home and school. Don't compare her with siblings.
Do praise strengths. Don't blame parents or the child.
Do review progress. Don't rely on one test alone.

How to behave and communicate

  • To the child: 'You are not in trouble. We want to understand what is hard for you.'

  • Listen to her words and play without correcting.

  • Avoid labelling her in front of others.

  • To the teacher: 'Can we share what we each notice?'

  • Keep your voice calm and encouraging.